President Obama asks the nation this week why on Earth he would want to serve for another term, a Christmas card ominously makes no mention of the twins, and the prime minister of Norway gets laid. It's the week of January 2nd, 2012. Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA Like The Onion on Facebook: http://www.fb.com/theonion Follow The Onion on Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/theonion